This may sound silly to most people but today I realized how un-Catholic I am and how I am an anomoly for my section of New Jersey. I am often scanning around theKnot.com on their message boards and of course frequent the South Jersey board the most for reviews of vendors and such from the area. I find it most interesting when people start to talk about church because a majority of the women on that board are Catholic and for the most part are only Catholic when it is convienent for them - i.e. marriages, baptisms, CCD, communion, etc. So they freak out when it comes time to talk to the priest about their wedding and their marriage because they don't know what to say when the priest asks 'Why do you want to get married in the Catholic church?' - their real answer is that they feel obligated because of family guilt and a mechanical switch that goes off in their minds when they think of weddings - it has nothing to do with their faith or how they think about God which is really sad in my opinion. If I were a Catholic priest (praise Jesus that I am not!) I would be honest with these couples and suggest that they rethink their reasons for getting married in a church - but then again, this might be why I am not Catholic.
The other extreme that I have encountered on this board is those people who have no religion because they do not want to be Catholic, as if the only option for religion is Catholicism and anything else is useless. Although, I have to respect them in some ways for not trying to put on a Catholic hat for their wedding day and then stuffing it back into their closet until they have a child and want it to be 'done' (baptism) so it doesn't go to hell. Somehow a Christian denomination (please note that Catholicism is not its own religion, its Christian and one of many established Christian churches) that maintains membership out of fear of hell and social damnation is either one of two things, 1) really smart because obviously it is working or 2) abusing its power over people and not proclaiming the graceful gospel that is apparent in the bible.
But this is just my humble, educated, experienced, opinion. I will continue to be one of the minority Protestant "Knotties" on that board and will proudly plan a wedding in a church that embraces all people, even Catholics.
*Please note that in this whole blog post I refer to the Catholic Church with a capitol 'C' and not as the catholic church with a lower case 'c'. This is to make certain that those who know that the 'church catholic', which encompasses all Christians, is different than the Roman Catholic Church.
** Also, please do not take this post as a slam to all Roman Catholic churches or parishoners, I have many RC friends and respect those who share in this faith and hope that we can find a day when we will come to worship God together.
1 comment:
i was raised catholic. i still don't understand why god supposedly won't recognize marriages that occur outside a catholic sanctuary. i got married in a garden, and if we were catholic (which we're not) i think god would like that we chose to do our vows in the nature he created instead of some building.
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